Homer Award: Shea Hillenbrand Thinks He’ll Play Into His Forties
As written earlier, we have started a new feature here at the Fleece Factor called The Homer Award. Click here for a description of this dubious honor.
Our first Homer Award will go to Shea Hillenbrand, who demonstrates time and time again that he is a complete Homer of himself. His latest display of self-homerism came today when, commenting on the fact that only one team has made an offer for his services this winter (the Giants, of course), the 32 year old said: “Something will come up. I’ve got about 10 years to go.” (Credit the LA Times for the quote.)
10 years? Allllllllllllllllllllrrrriiiiiiiiiiight, Homer. I don’t think so.
Newsflash, Shea: You’re not that good. In fact, you’re less than mediocre for the position you play. Your On-Base Percentage in 2006 was .313, and you followed that up in 2007 with a stellar OBP of .270. You have average power for a corner infielder (at best) and have seen your batting average fall in each of the last three seasons. Your defense is shaky. And, oh, by the way, you’re kind of crazy. Remember the time when you tried to fight your manager in Toronto? Or, when after getting traded from Boston, you marched into the GM’s office and reminded him of the Jeff Bagwell trade?
Shea, your skills are that of a decent bench player but with your attitude, no team in their right mind would want you as a bench player where you will undoubtedly explode at some point in the season, and ruin the team chemistry. Who’s to say that after not getting a start for a week, you won’t tell off your manager, or rub a teammate the wrong way? Bottom line: You’re just not worth the risk. There’s a reason you’ve played for 6 teams in 7 seasons. So I would suggest taking your one year offer from the Giants, and relaxing. You’re an average player, with an opportunity to make a couple million bucks to play part-time. Stop being such a homer of yourself, and go grab that cheddar before you end up playing 3rd base for the Long Island Ducks!
Filed under: Arizona Diamondbacks, Boston Red Sox, Los Angeles Angels, Los Angeles Dodgers, San Francisco Giants, Toronto Blue Jays, _Homer Awards
Oh Shea… The best thing you did for Toronto (other than your pity AS vote) was getting traded for Jeremy Accardo.
HAHA, that is great! What an idiot. Or Homer, I guess.
I think Jose “Bat Man” Offerman has got a better chance playing third for the Ducks next season than Shea Hillenbrand. My only question is, which Shea will be the first to retire this season, the man or the stadium?
Interesting question that you pose, Fred. But I say the poor excuse for a 1B Shea lasts longer than the poor excuse for an MLB stadium, Shea. Even if Hillenbrand isn’t signed on to a team by the end of 2008, he is too conceited to reitre first. He likely thinks GM’s are waiting an extra year to free more payroll for his services in a multi-year deal…
Oh My! The 1st recipient of my uncoveted bozo award is a real dingle berry. I thought I had a big head, seems only fitting that Shea wins. By the end of the season he’ll own the award outright with at least three homers. Seems that the roids have worn off and all that’s left is attitude. Check out the numbers after coming off an injury…you’ll get the point. He used to be so humble…now he just so homer. Shea if you read this, tell Clemens to stop calling. Roger thinks that if he keeps up the dosage he’ll have a head similar to mine by the end of the season…I don’t want Clemens to be a homer. See you in Tempe for the workout…good luck in Triple A. I hear the D-backs renamed your stadium HGH or Homer G Hillenbrand.
PS Don’t be so paranoid…the apple doesn’t fall far from the tree
Dated this loser in high school. Glad to see he is still the loser he was then. P.S. He sucks in bed.